Makes a lotta sense to me!

A glimpse of my funeral ... now that I've paid for a prepaid cremation including disposal of the remains (me?) into the Pacific Ocean

After receiving a dozen or so fliers advertising prepaid cremation deals in the mail and after seeing a few ads and/or feature articles in the local newspaper, it occurred to me that I could save "whoever" a lot of anxiety coming up with a "funeral,"--or whatever they are called nowadays--and having to figure out what to do with the old man anyway.

I could be a bit proactive and take care of the entire affair myself.

Notice how clean and neat an empty church (above) looks. Even that makes more sense!

A couple of phonecalls to get a good price (certainly cheaper than any funeral home, casket, burial plot, etc.!) on an all-details-covered prepaid package, I chose Neptune Society (sounds like a swimming club) to take care of EVERYTHING from the time I fall over dead until the time the ashes (me?) are dumped into the ocean. Yup, they even come to pick up the corpse (me?) and deliver it (me?) to the crematorium and then deliver the ashes (me?) to the ocean -- or wherever anyone on the other end of a phonecall might want them (me?) delivered (the Sistine Chapel sounds nice) from a mailbox to a hole in the ground ... and voilla! It's done! Just for the record, I checked the box labeled "buried at sea" on the contract.

They even take care of registering my death with the State and delivering a little box of "mementos" to whomever in the world would want such a gruesome little maple-looking wooden box ... containing pictures of my cats and dog and maybe my bifocals, a stapler, a ball-pint pen, my drivers license, some shredded credit cards, and anything else that might fit in a 8" x 8" x 5" box. I can even use the box to hold paper clips in the meantime.

Yeh, they even included the little box.

I mentioned my decision (already made ... and signed, sealed and notarized) to a couple of my youngsters (actually adults, of course) and they seemed satisfied that it was a smart move--well, one son wasn't that pleased, but didn't have a better idea.

Did I mention that the boat ride--at least for the ashes--is included at no extra cost?

Also, it's 100% ecologically and environmentally green--I mean figuratively speaking, of course. Well, there is the smoke, I suppose ... but not one square inch of our rapidly crowding earth is used unnecessarily.

Anyway, I really think more folks (young or old) should think of this as a legal and painless (I hope! They do check bodies to insure they are brain-dead before shoving them into the oven, don't they?) way of getting some of the details out of the way in advance of ...

Well, you know what I mean.

Neat, huh?